11 Ways To Stop Caring About What Others Think

Lukas Schwekendiek
3 min readSep 14, 2021

Truth be told, no one really cares about you.

That is not to say they hate you, nor that they’re jerks, but rather that they are too busy focused on themselves to truly care about you.

The best way this was described to me was this:

Remember that you are an Extra in other people’s movies.

They are the main character, the protagonists, the hero or heroine of the story, whereas you are a random character that sometimes comes along for more.

Now think about how you treat those Extras in movies.

It does not matter if they get blown up, get flung across the screen or just disappear, you do not care.

Not because you are mean or because they do not matter, but rather because you are too focused on the main story and the characters in the center of the screen.

It is the same thing that happens when you walk around.

We just all believe that everyone thinks about because we see ourselves as the main character, and therefore the center of everyone’s attention.

But that’s not how it works.

So take a breath, relax and allow yourself the freedom to be who you want to be.

Even if you make mistakes, mess up or embarrass yourself, no one will truly care, at least not for long.

Now, I wanted to make sure to get that explanation out of the way first, as that belief will carry the most carefree attitude.

But with that being said there are, of course, still plenty of other ways to stop caring about what others think.

  1. Focus On What Matters — Do what matters to you and build a repertoire of experiences that really count for you. In light of those, what other people think of you will fade into the background.
  2. Live A Large Life — Be brave, be bold and go out of your way to exit your comfort zone. The more you do, the harder you live, the easier it will be for you not to care.
  3. Actually Ask Them — When in doubt: Ask. See what people truly think of you by confronting them. Likely, they will not even have noticed what you were so worried about.



Lukas Schwekendiek

Life Coach, Speaker, Writer. Published on TIME, Inc & Huffington Post. Coaching available again! Email: Lukas.schwekendiek@gmail.com with the word "Coaching"